The Zoo

Here are some photos I wanted to share from my trip to the zoo yesterday






I had the biggest desire to hug this tiger, to caress him, to let him lick me. I just wanted to be with him it was strange

Same Swami, Different Swami

It's so interesting every time I see Swamiji for eN TV I know it's basically the same person (or what ever you call him) but at the same time, and this is the overriding feeling most of the time, it feels like I am seeing a new and glorious Swami every single night that I watch. The way he talks and dresses the different jewels, or lack of jewels. Every time I see his it is the same yet different Swamiji. I hope you, or some of you are watching eN TV, tell me about it! if your not here is the link. You have to make an account, but it's not that hard.
I love this picture, my favorite is the center photo. I took it off the dyanapeetam website

Living a Vedic Life

I don't known if that is the best title for this blog, but what I have to now is pretty good so...
I realized a few days ago that no matter how Americanized I get going through a public high school and all (that sounds really funny considering I AM American) I have had this sort of spiritual base directly from the age of 11 and really even younger then that, just not quite as directly (my mom took my family to this Buddhist place a couple times and had a few different gurus before Swamiji.) the way a house is built on a foundation my life is being built on spirituality rather then the many things most kid's lives are built on today (friends, TV, animals) the reason a realized this is on Friday one of my friends had a surprise birthday and right before I left I realized I had not gotten her a gift. So I grabbed the first thing I could think a five sided rudraksha bead about 1 inch in diameter. I threaded it onto a string and gave it to her (and she really liked it, I think) but what I wanted to write about was how the first that came to my mind put of all the things in the world was a rudraksha bead. I mean that's what Shiva wears and this girl is definitely not Hindu. So I wanted to share that, please comment!!

eN Kriya

Hallo Everyone!!!
So today you get to hear about eN Kriya. Swamiji introduced this new meditation called eN Kriya it is like the new Nithya Dhyaan. It's got all these benefits and makes your mitrocondria grow something like 13,000% (honestly I don't know what that means, but that's what my mom tells everyone on the phone, so I am writing it here.) The only thing about this wonderful meditation, I really don't like it. Well let me put it this way, my mind flat out decided it didn't like it, and in terms like that I end up siding with my mind a lot, yes I know that's bad, I am working on it! Anyhow I didn't do it every Saturday when Swamiji did it with the group, actually I was taking pictures. Nor did I do it before going to school or after school. In short after the first time I avoided doing it all together. Then After my breakdown what was it last week? I think. My mom would wait for me when I got home from school and we would do it together. So I did it for about a week, except on Monday, Tuesday, and Sunday. Cause my days where so full I couldn't fit it in. Now besides the fact I still don't like the actual main Kriya part (where you hold your breath as long as you can 21 times) It is getting easier. The other thing I found was that when I did the Kriya my days went smoother. I cannot explain how this happens, but it does so anyone who wants to learn eN Kriya comment and I'll tell you how. Thanks for reading!!

To Master Must Learn

To Master must learn. What does that mean? It goes right along with that saying practice makes perfect. I have wanted to write this entry for a really long time, after I finally understood this truth, but it never seemed the right time. Now it seems like the right time, after a weekend of music, and tonight again another band concert. I always used to think that it was only worth doing things that you where good at. I believed everyone in life something, or somethings that they where really good at and the should just stick to those things, many of the things, like dance classes, that I was not instantly good at I would quit. baking was difficult at first, but picked it so fast, same with anything that had to do with cloth, thread or yarn I was really good at those things and didn't believe I had to learn them any more, another of my faults. For some reason I didn't truly realize until recently that you really had to work to master things, to practice again and again. Flute is the big thing that taught me that, I used to play clarinet and simply quit because I was not good, but there was something about flute that I could not quit, even though I was horrible compared to all the other girls in my section, who had been playing a lot longer then me. I didn't practice for over a year simply assuming if I played the once a day in band I would get good, because my mom played, wasn't I destined to be wonderful?! You are all probably laughing at me right now, how silly is this teenage yogi girl, but honestly thats what I thought! It was talking to Briana as I will call her here that really changed things Briana is amazing at flute, she is only a sophmore and beat both the seniors, she is really good, but it's just because she suddenly was good at it, she is three bands, and practices A LOT! So that is my new thing, I am actually going to try practicing and not just giving up when I don't do good, at least that is my goal and I am writing it here, now I gotta go get dressed for my concert!!

Guru Mantra

This morning my mom and I had a sort of row (I love that word!) over various personal things. I am sure all of you out there that are, or once where teens know exactly what I mean. Well I got very emotional and was crying when I got on the bus, I continued to cry, huddled in my seat, staring out the window for a couple minutes. I took out my mala and clutched it, thinking how unfair it all was and going on and on in my head. As Swamiji would would say a visous cycle. Without thinking in my mind about I started to chant the Guru Mantra (Om Hreem Nithyanandaya Namaha) it was like either my unconcious, or excistence, or Swamiji, or God made me do it, I had no part in this but I felt better. First I was chanting through tears, those dried up and then I chanted through shaky breath and when my breath became steady I simply chanted.
We arrived at school and I got off the bus and in the still dark morning air walked into the doors. And I was fine and had a great day
By the way Happy Saint Patty's Day!!!!

My Book

So I meant to write this post a few days ago, but totally forgot, so here it is now.
During Swamiji's Brahma Sutra message a few days back, I think Saturday, but maybe it was Sunday, Swamiji talked about something he used to do called My Book. He kept these books that had his understanding of his Master's talks, the spiritual activities and so fourth. He kept talking about it, and then said how we should all keep a "My Book" then he added if we wanted to we could do it on facebook. That's when I realized I already keep a My Book, my blog!! So that was fun to know that I a doing something that Swamiji did when he was my age, although he told me to write this blog, but it's still very cool.

Do You Enjoy Your Life?

Do you enjoy your life?
This question was directed at me earlier tonight at Barn Buddies. This is a program at Equi-Velent horse barn for special needs kids. I was volunteering and we where playing a Saint Patricks day in preparation for the Holiday this Saturday. I had braided Little Red's (a mini horse Shetland pony mix, cutest pony in the world the size of a large Labrador) with green yarn he ws the "Leprechaun" and was trying to find the lost gold as was his kid for the evening a 14 year old boy named Garrison. He was leading the pony and I was walking on Red's other side to make sure all went well. Then Garrison said to me
"I enjoy my life, do you enjoy your life?" I thought about this question for a few seconds before answering as we walked around the ring Red following along like a good dog. Just yesterday I was lying in my bed. shaking with sobs because I felt everything was unfair, but really even with that my answer was
"Yes, I do enjoy my life." "good." Garrison said confirming my answer, and making me smile and we walked in silence for a few more minutes. I realized I had said the right thing, even though I have gone through a lot of emotional unstableness and been quite frustrated lately I do really enjoy my life.

Amazing ... as Usual

So as in my former blog entry today I expressed concerns for feeling split in between. At about nine 0' clock she went to bed. My Dad was at the temple and my sister already asleep. The house was mine! OK I didn't do anything drastic, I just sat down at the imac, my Dad's school computer which he brought home for the weekend and I dearly love using, I checked my email, wrote a blog entry, checked facebook then saw that one video I posted in my last entry, watched half of it then it was time for morning message. So my actual problem that I didn't totally right about is still physically there but all my tension about it is gone. I have a clear understanding now of what I have to do. The thing is about me, every time I have a problem I become this big drama queen over it call my bestie in Seattle and cry to her while she tries to comfort me and give solutions and I just act like a complete know it all thing and then that night or sometimes even sooner I will happen to watch or read something of Swamiji's and no mater what my problem is, or what he says it solves my issue. Or at least how I view the issue which is the thing in this case. I still don't know what to do about my conflict, but now I realize it will resolve. It's just a matter of time, and I can't do anything about it, all I can do is stop my mind from chewing on it, and be blissful!!

I have wanted to use this picture for over six months, but never felt it to be the right time. Now I think it is time for me to show my "warrior picture" as I call it, my friend and I were playfully fighting with wooden swords I had made for a movie I was making I had just triumphed over her when this picture was taking in oh the wonderful heat of August

Video Post One

Dear Readers,

I have decided to start posting youtube videos when I have nothing to post about myself. Videos on Swamiji talking. The best reason for this is that I get to watch the videos before I post them so I can talk about the, write about them, and then you guys can comment on them. So today is this video. It has become instantly popular and I really love it myself. I love how informal it is and yet the information given is so special. So please watch it and tell me what you think, I think this is an amazing video, and Swamiji said he will be posting more like it soon, informal talks. So enjoy, please watch. and COMMENT!!!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=giJPyMuQLQg&feature=player_embedded#at=433

Internal Conflict

Hey readers! How are you?

Keeping up with my promise I made some time back I am writing an entry that took me a couple days to get up the courage to write, but I have decided to spiel it. OK so here it is. I have been getting a lot more into outside activities, mainly the horse barn, but besides that 4H meetings, I am trying to write a novel about centaurs (don't judge me there it's actually really good) and I don't know all this stuff. So Then there is the temple, I have my set days that I still go to and all that. I keep up with my required work there, but because of this whole morning message thing, and now the Brahma Sutras to volunteers are being asked to come a lot more, which is something I am kinda not prepared to do. See I love Swamiji and Anandaswara with something beyond love if that can make any sense at all, but I am just really not into this whole vedic culture thing right now. OK let me rephrase that, I love the concept of Vedic Culture, but I am not so thrilled about eating Indian food all the time, and wearing white cotton clothes, doing hours of meditation and yoga all day ... in an Ashram civilization it works, but maybe it's just that I am a teenager or what but it just doesn't appeal to me right now. OK I definitely don't want to wear low cut shirts and blah, I don't like those styles. Of course as my family's lives are centered around the temple this creates a bit of conflict for me as I am sure you can imagine. So far I have not found a solution, but that is what's going inside my little brain right now, and I just wanted to share it with you!
That's a picture I took at the Columbus Zoo and Aquarium last summer. It is a Polar bear during feeding time if you cannot tell.

The Whole Truth

My dear readers
Last Saturday in his new Bramha sutras message. Swamiji talked about how you should open up and tell the whole truth to everyone who comes in your breathing space, or at least that's how I interpreted it. That got me thinking about this blog one reason I haven't been writing is
I had this crazy idea that I should be writing about my specific positive experiences which as some or all of you know don't happen everyday except for some certain people. Actually that's not even true I suppose all experiences can be positive it just the way you look at them. But what i am going to try and write all my experiences not just the ones I consider to be great spiritual achievements. For example last night I had a full out breakdown like I was laying in my bed crying over an English assignment! I don't know why ... it could have been the fact that I have not been meditating much these past few weeks (oops!) or the fact I was tired after being at the barn for a few hours exercising in other words walking all over the place leading horses and riding. Or that I got my period that day but I did have a breakdown and cried myself to sleep. So yep there is the full and total truth.

Prathyksha Padhuka Pooja

Hey Everyone!
Yesterday was Sivarathri the day to honor Lord Shiva. But right now I don't want to talk about that. Maybe in a later entry, maybe not. We will see. I have wanted to write this entry for a really long time. Weeks ago when this whole morning message thing got started something that went with it was to be Prathyksha Padhuka Pooja. At first I found it extremely bothersome. A whole half an hour of pooja, one of least favorite things. I now it doesn't sound to spiritual to say that, but I am being honest. I just hate sitting still for pooja. I would do everything in my possible power to avoid that part of the morning message. Then if you remember the Sharp Tongue Sanskrit entry I learned how to chant the mantras. I still don't love sitting there especially cause you have to sit straight and look all proper like. But whenever I start chanting for it I have this immense welling of pride and love for Swamiji. Also what I noticed night before last is that as soon as I start the chanting in front of Swamiji my beck automatically becomes straight and I am able to sit cross-legged. As soon as the pooja is over I can't do those things I don't know why ... it's so weird, yet really cool. I just love every aspect of it now, so i wanted to share that here, Maybe I will find out the answer to some of these questions later, but for now I am just putting what is happening out there. If there is anything you want me to write about make sure to comment or something.