Down There

   

There are those times in life where when someone asks you how you are, and the only response is to scowl and roll your eyes and then change the subject to something utterly depressing. At least... thats me today. I'd love to say my thoughts were filled with rainbows and unicorns and positivity, but... nope. I'm 19 and having a hate the world day, in which every student that orders a pumpkin spice latte at the café gets a death glare, and my friends receive non-caring, mono-tone, text answers opposed to my normal novel lengthen replies.
    Oh yes there are reasons, there are excuses I could make, but what it boils down to is letting those wonderful emotions and hormones take over the delicate mind, and a semi-conscious decision to let them win. On a physical note... this life I'm living:
   Still not in school, but of course finding 1001 things to fill my time. In the mornings I head over to the barn, steaming coffee in hand to feed and ride my horse. This part of the day is usually filled with much joy and dancing a singing, the latter while on the horse mostly. This is followed by various sewing a knitting projects at home while watching obscene amounts of Netflix (we're on Gilmore Girls at the moment after recently finishing Mary Queen of Scots, and then all of Scrubs, and before all that Call the Midwife) usually attempting to clean a room that I previously got dirty, and then eating a rushed lunch and getting ready in less then five minutes for work. So then I go and get increasing annoyed at the entire human race with every latte and mocha I mix and brew, I actually really like that part I think its more the repetitive action-enclosed in a tiny space with one other person-on a forced time schedule thing that gets to me, and then I come home burning with stress and anxiety to roll around and cuddle with the dog that is currently mine, and watch more Netflix, and sew more historical garments that I don't really need, but most definitely want, before a late bedtime. So there you are, school does approach quickly though, January 4! Dorm assignments, picking out classes, schedules.... all happening in November, which happens to be two days away. Thankful with writing the anger and irritation has trickled away as it tends to do and I am left with a set purpose, a desire to do some productive! Maybe after just one more episode....